Thank you all who have been here to view this page of mine.
I had opened this account to express myself, through art to the world, and more specifically, to my ex-girlfriend.
By doin the digital stuff tat i had submitted, i was expressing the ups and downs of my life.... My endeavours in being recognised in this community, and proving myself i can do it. I had tried vector art, digital painting, 3d rendering, cartoon, anime, cell-shading.. all, just to prove to myself tat wat other people can do, i can too. it was a way of satiating my deep regret for having underachieved in my real world life, namely my academic career after high school.
As i read thru my journals, and my past submissions, all the emotions tat were present in me when i was writing or doing them flowed back to me.. how i was so happy with my girlfren, minimin. i even remember wat songs i was listenin to, or how hot n sweaty i was feelin in the middle of the night n sometimes, how i felt so angry and misunderstood. i had moved them to the scraps section since it came up, coz it was a time when i tot i could move on with my life. but i cant. its almost as if all the misgivings tat i have about her, and myself, haunt me perpetually...
so i've decided to leave DA, to leave this account. because the main reason for this account has expired into thin air together with the futility of our relationship.
Thank you all, friends tat i have made here, and even more to those who reply to my ramblings in these journal entries. i wish u all the best in watever art interests u have.
because art....IS an expression of love.
...for nature, for life, tats why we draw, n make stuff..
n live with our convictions..be it anime or 3d abstract.
to papermoose, i do hope u hope u feel better with your frens, our photos are great, they see something out of our mundane lifes and tats wat make u special, not popularity or watever....and hope your camera gets fixed soon too.
to transientfaerie, i hope u move on with your life after your chocolate cookie incident too.
I love you minimin.
I really do.
But our relationship has come to this point, where we both know everything we try to do makes it even more futile.